similar to my Thanksgiving break, this winter break has been a break of nothingness.
i have eaten at least one hundred cookies, i have read about Rome and about romance, i have slept for about a week straight.
i have pretty much been in isolation, not seeing really any friends at all but instead going to the park with my dad, an art gallery with my mom, shopping with my sister, the movies with my aunt and cousin. i enjoyed stepping back from that world into the separate world of my family.
i spent my new years snuggled under my covers struggling to stay up until 12 to say “happy new year” to myself and then drift off to sleep amidst sirens, firecrackers, and my parents’ snoring.
and while it was one of the worst breaks because i was sick once again, it gave me a new perspective on life, a new chance of life, and it forced me – and now i like to say it permitted me – to do nothing. and i guess i enjoyed this nothing.
today my sister came downstairs to see me drinking water slowly and reading a travel book while listening to blaring bob dylan. she said, aren’t you bored of doing nothing? no, rather, i am reveling in la dolce far niente, the sweetness of doing nothing.
and while this break was much much short of extravagant – i miss christmas already, i never went to nyc like i wanted to, i never did hot yoga, i never enjoyed cheese like i wanted to, and yes i do miss my friends very much – i did get to watch the movie elf way too many times, i got to sleep, i got to eat chocolate covered pretzels for breakfast, and i got to experience the sweetness of doing nothing.
and instead of getting down on myself and sulking because i accomplished technically nothing of great importance this break, i am instead choosing to celebrate that i had this opportunity and security to truly rest.
a while ago superforester mathew wrote to me in response to one of my posts, telling me “to make meaning out of the seemingly mundane and useless.” for some reason, those words stuck with me. and that is what i did this break, i found meaning in those pretzels and bob dylan and i love it.
you can do anything
i fell in love with this tiny flower in the windowbox outside of my bedroom. after the snow melted away and everything else around it was beyond dead, this purple and yellow was revealed, and it still persists. persist, superforesters. persist. you can do anything. 2011 is here and we will make incredible changes, and one day we will come to truly appreciate la dolce far niente, in which we may find our happiness.
☼Brooke
i would like to add my congratulations to jason and tristan, two amazing hearts
